Paris Hilton does a great job in this video interview of showing how completely shallow, stupid and retarded she is. She talks about how she went to South Korea and China and did a lot of business there. (Wow! Maybe she should teach a business course! Duh! Duh!). She also talks about like oh wow, it would be cool like if she had a baby so her kid could play with Nicole’s kid. What a dumb-ass stupid bitch. I wouldn’t trust my worst enemy’s kid with her. What’s the deal with all these idiotic celebrities that have ZERO business taking care of kid and treat it like it’s a product they buy in a store, or like going shopping for a new pet. It makes me want to beat the shit out of somebody.

Check out this video of Paris Hilton winning the award for the most shallow, stupid celebutard of the day.

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Adele Silva (born 19 November 1980 in Croydon, London) is an English actress, television personality and sometime glamour model …  and sometimes she gives me a boner! Like right now!

It’s a sunny morning in the Big Forest and the Bear family are just waking up. Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It is empty!
"Who’s been eating my porridge?!" he squeaks.
Daddy Bear arrives at the table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl. It is also empty!
"Who’s been eating my porridge?!" he roars.
Mummy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and screams, "For God’s sake, how many times do we have to go through this? I haven’t even made the f***ing porridge yet!!"

Actress Eva Longoria said that she would like to look like Demi Moore and know how to dance like Jennifer Lopez.

The star of one of the best known series, Desperate Housewives, hopes that she will age like Demi Moore. Besides that, Eva would like to know how to move her hips like Jennifer Lopez. "When I am 42, I want to look like Demi Moore. I do not know how she does it, but her beauty is helped by being content, and being emotionally and physically healthy" - said the sexy housewife. "I love to sing and dance, even though I am not too good at them. I love to pretend that I know how to sing and dance like Jennifer Lopez".

I like to pretend I am fucking Eva Longoria, and here’s some pictures to help.

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Q. What’s the Cuban National Anthem?
A. Row, Row, Row Your Boat

Q. Where does an Irish family go on vacation
A. A different bar

Q. What did the Chinese couple name their retarded baby?
A. Sum Ting Wong

Q. What do you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A. A speech impediment

Q. What does it mean when the Post Office’s flag is flying at half-mast?
A. They’re hiring

Q. Why aren’t there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek?
A. Because they’re not going to work in the future either.

Q. What do you call a Mississippi farmer with a sheep under each arm?
A. A pimp.

Q. Why do Driver Education classes in redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
A. Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

Q. What’s the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A. The southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with a recipe.

Q. How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the "F" word?
A. Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell "BINGO!"

Q. What’s the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale???
A. A northern fairytale begins, "Once upon a time…" A southern fairytale begins, "Y’all ain’t gonna believe this shit."

Q. Why doesn’t Mexico have an Olympic team?
A. Because all the Mexicans who can run, jump or swim are already in the United States ..

Here’s Ana Beatriz Barros, Brazilian super model that you may have seen in Victoria’s Secret Model and Sports Illustrated, modeling for Intimissimi.

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Who is the most useless celebrity? That can be a very difficult question to answer, but in this case we have a math formula to help us.

How to calculate a celebrity’s pointlessness

C = Cash: Annual income, expressed on a scale of 1-10, then squared.
B = Brand value: The number of different outlets for the star’s money-making (such as records, books, personal appearances, scent, clothing line), expressed on 1-10 scale.
G = Google index. The number of hits, in millions, when you search the star’s name on Google.
P = Publicity (column inches, magazine covers, TV documentaries), expressed on a 1-10 scale.
D = Delinquency factor (arrests, rehab, love scandals, court cases, children being removed, etc.), on 1-10 scale.
T = Actual talent, expressed in a creative activity, on the 1-10 scale.
PQ = Personal qualities (intelligence, beauty, kindness, wit), on the 1-10 scale.
((C%B2 + B)G) + (P x D) T x PQ

The lower the score, the more pointless the celebrity. Check out how Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian, Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan and Heidi Montag stack up against one another. I really thought Britney or Lindsay would be the most useless.

NY Daily News Article: The Useless Celebrity Index

Following up hot British Babe Lucy Pinder from yesterday, here we have the luscious Keeley Hazell topless with stockings, heels and garters. I would say this counts as a "happy moment" for today.

Learn more about Keeley on her official web site: http://www.keeleyhazell.com/

9 more pics after the jump …

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If I would have known this, I would have been a good boy this year … or is it a bad boy?

Link

Can you say super hot British babe with great tits? I thought so. Or, you can just say Lucy Pinder for short. Damn, I never knew she had such a nice rack! This has to be the best video I have seen all day.

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